Thursday, April 22, 2010
Writing Topic #1 p. 937
Becoming infatuated with someone you do not really know is like waiting on the results of a final that will decide whether or not you pass or fail a really important test. When you do not know someone very well and you are barely getting to know them it seems so nerve wracking because like an important test you are so hopeful that the result will be fantastic and that you will pass but on the other hand you are also terrified that you failed miserably and the doubt and fear of both success and failure eats away at you. Sometimes it seems that the things that are most important or the things that will have the biggest effect on you take the longest time to relate their result. An hour can seem like a year and a day a century, but when it comes to something that you feel you really need, like a great score, the time never goes fast enough. The result of this “test” can seem like the end of the world, or the beginning, depending on your result and how dramatic you are. Many times, after walking out of the situation, once the test is finished it can seem like such a sure thing that you aced it, but I have come to the conclusion that it is usually in these situations that you fail, its like the universe plays this huge joke and lets you think you have won, only to later reveal that you have actually lost. In contrast this, I have learned that in many cases you can walk out after a test and be sure that you just failed miserably and often times when you get your results, you will be shocked to find that you actually passed, either by a decent margin or completely. So often times it is no use what so ever to speculate about the test and whether you passed or failed. Most of the time the only thing to do is wait and see what happens. It can be the hardest thing to do because it is not like you can say “ok mind, stop thinking what your thinking”, but there are a lot of times where you have to forget about some things or lose it. I do not want to sound overly dramatic but im sure there are plenty of people that can attest to the truth behind this. Especially when you are young, when you find someone that completely catches your attention and holds onto it; it can seem that, like that much needed good grade, your happiness hinges on the result. Any form of “love” even infatuation brings numerous problems and worries, no matter your age because everyone always has the highest hopes that they will come out the winner. Even though like that test, you can do all the preparation possible, yet that final grade rests with someone else and their interpretation or opinion. It is the same in relationships, you can only try so hard and out so much effort, the rest is up to the other person.
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I totally understand what you mean. I feel the same way when I take huge finals/tests. It always takes forever for me to receive my score regardless of how good I think I did. I hate it! I do think that is funny that you said it's like the universe plays a huge joke on you when you think you did well. It always happens to me! I go in, take the test, and walk out very confident. I say to myself, "hey I did really good...I mean, besides one or two of the questions, I did great!" Then I go home, and relax thinking I did awesome. Then, of course, I go to school and get my score and BAM! I get a low grade. It's happened so much that I've just learned to laugh at it. There's not much else that I can do. It's funny to me because I always think I did bad, but, I always think in the back of my head of the whole situation, and how I probably didn't do bad. It's really something funny that I think we should all laugh at. This does work well with your metaphor. You said that waiting for the test is like when your meeting someone new. This seems to be perfectly said. Also, the whole joke that the planet plays on you could also be applied to this scenario. It hasn't really happened to me but i do believe that from time to time people do think that someone might like them or hate them, and they actually feel the opposite.
ReplyDeleteI really appreciate the thought that you put into this blog, and I love the metaphor. I love it because I understand both situations pretty well, as I am most certainly one of the ones who overanalyzes how I did on any given test, to no avail. It is too true that so often we think we bombed a test that we aced, or vice versa, and it is obnoxiously frustrating at best. I think we might agree though, the worse end of it would be to think you did good, only to fail horribly, through rejection or a bad grade. In both situations, you are putting yourself out there, unable to control the outcome, simply bearing an inner part of yourself, be it knowledge or feelings, and from there, there is nothing more that you can do but hope for the best. Tis one of the many times in life where we are forced to accept the lack of control we have over things.
ReplyDeleteI like your connection between tests and relationships, as it really is almost a drawn back version. With the test we must put ourselves into it, giving our very best, and then judgement time comes. We can do nothing more but wait and see what happens, hoping that our best is good enough, or desirable by the other person. Also, luckily for us, in terms of relationships, we get a little more leeway than on a test, as it is up to the other person completely, with no right or wrong answers. This meaning, even if you completely botch your attempt to put yourself out there, for some odd reason they might find this endearing, or at least catch their attention so that they cannot wait to see what odd thing you do next.